Kipling's Cat (mintogrubb) wrote in life_on_earth,
Kipling's Cat
mintogrubb
life_on_earth

Owning the issues and managing change

A big problem for many people these days is that

a)life is very complicated and
b) too much is happening
so that
c)it's hard to keep up and stay on top of things.

So I think we should start by disscussing ways of coping with this. For some, the answer is to retreat into a fantasy world where they become passive spectators of what goes on, and nothing happens here that is challenging in any way.

Examples include football, Big Brother on TV, Soap Operas and the like. These hold a fascination over millions of people because they present an illussion of drama and action, but if you look at the outcomes in the lives of the spectators, you see none. They simply confirm whatever prejudices or points of view hat the spectator holds, and life still happens " out there" for the people watching.

To get more out of life, you must put more in. So let's talk about that.
when I was running my own business, I soon found out that people came in two sizes. There were people who could make decisions and do results, and those who wanted everything done for them while they sucked passively on the teat of life and took whatever came up, however grudgingly. For some people, it's a case of "somebody ought to do something about it" - but 'somebody'is never them.

Look at the big people in history, people like Martin Luther King, Gandhi, Wilberforce, and anyone else who created great social change. these people had the attitude of "If it's going to happen, it has to be me that makes it happen". It was a caee of them deciding to be active participants, not passive spectators, in what happened.if their was a problem, it was *their* problem and *they* would fix it. Martin Luther was only a lowly believer, one of many millions in the Catholic Church when he nailed his grievances to the church door in Wittenburg in Germany. It was for Popes and Cardinals to lead the Church in those days, but he ended up having far more impact than any of them - because he took ownership of the issue. he came at life as an active participant, not a pasivve spectator, and carried the day.

Once you assume responsibility, though, it is really scarey. for most people, life just takes them along, and they sit back and stare at the view. for me, the problem with that is that someone else is deciding where we go today and will dictate the view we get from the window. For the active participant, though, there comes a sense of responsibility. you really get to confront who you are, because if it happens it's down to you.

Actually, this was always true. It was true when you deided to live life through others and be pasive by default - but then, you could alsways blame 'them' for how bad it was. Now, your results are down to you. Nothing is going to happen unless you can make it happen, so 'how big, and how good are you anyway?' is an immediate and obvious question.

Do not assume that the situation is static. Living life in the fast lane brings challenge and brings growth. change your world and you change with it. If you have access to a computer and can use it to blog, you have all that you really need. You have far more than many have, certainly more than i had 20 years ago.

But, change is scary and when faced with uncertainty, people like to retreat to the certainties they knew rather than embrace the new, the different and challenging situation that change will bring.

" It's the heart afraid of breaking
that never learns to dance.
Its the dream afraid of waking
that never takes the chance.
Its the one who won't be taken
finds it oh, so hard to give,
and the soul afraid of dying,
that never starts to live"

Change is part of life. If you don't change and become changed, you never really live, you just exist. we must embrace change and seek it out, for it enlivens us. However, for some, the change is superficial. men , I have to say, are prone to making the mistake of creating change in order to make their mark, and having change for the sake of change. it is often neccessary to involve others, to get their input and allow them to make decisions on things that affect them. only if others have a stake in the outcome do they feel that they own this change and fell a sense of commitment to making it work. If, though, they do feel that it's about them, and they will see some benifit from it, will they support it and give it their own energy and help make it happen.

Remember also, that big changes happen over time. they are hard to achieve, difficult to manage and are often off putting for these very same reasons. To be appealling, change must be gradual.

Big and sudden change, imposed from on high, is frightening and puts people off. even people who want those changes to happen find the scale intimidating at first. A small and managable amount of change, however, most people will readily accept and find a use for. Even if it is only getting a can of Coke out of the machine...

In this community, I hope to create a space where we can manage change and growth can happen; for us personally and for the world we live in. The problem with self help books and their gurus is that there is no chance of personal interaction, and the money tends to go up and away instead of coming down to those who need it - like us! This is definitly something I want to change!
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"In this community, I hope to create a space where we can manage change and growth can happen"

I have always been afraid of change and yet sitting and stagnating in unacceptable situations is not very productive either. Duh. Thanks Captain Obvious! Usually when the pain of not changing gets worse than the fear of making a change, then and only then do I get my silly butt in gear and make a greater effort. I had a friend whose nickname was "John Ass-On-Fire Williams." He passed away a few years ago from the big "C". He was a great guy and I learned a lot from him. He always said basically the same thing that I just said. Only he used to say, "My ass has to be on fire before I will do anything about it!"
yeah, but sometimes I regret change...because small things chance, like the ingredients for my favourite chocolate and then it tastes totally different.

then again, change is the only thing that brings us foreward. though I wish that only neccessary changes happen...because why change something which is great?!
because small things chance, like the ingredients for my favourite chocolate and then it tastes totally different.

LMAO reminds me of a mail gemof51 sent me a while back, because then it is "New and Improved" eh lol.

How typical of a woman to think of chocolate as being a silly thing in life to change. lol.
How typical of a woman to think of chocolate as being a silly thing in life to change. lol.
Chocolate is serious. manufacturers should think seriously before they mess with the recipes and ingredients they use.

To anyone who finds that their favourite bar has been altered, messed with or mucked about with in any way whatsoever, I say that the only way to achieve satisfaction is to learn the fine art of making chocolate yourself.
To anyone who finds that their favourite bar has been altered, messed with or mucked about with in any way whatsoever, I say that the only way to achieve satisfaction is to learn the fine art of making chocolate yourself.

lol as if our modern lives were not complicated enough.

Then again I couldn't agree more, but FFS Minto, we want pizza, we go to the freezer, we want curry, we go to the freezer, we want scones, we go to the cupboard/freezer, hell does anyone other than my mother ever bake/cook anymore?
yeah, that's right...
nobody's really cooking anymore. I do, but it's nothing big, no real mean...just potatoes and veggies (no, not out of the freezer :) ) and some sort of meat...that's all. it's a shame, really. Cooking can be so much fun and it tastes so much better when it's all fresh and...real.
I can only repaet wot is already said...
if you want more out of life, you must put more in.
Rather than spend time watching second rate soaps on TV, minto grubbwould rather learn to cook.

of course, if you just want to invest a bit of money instead of hours of precious time, simply buy an of the shelf product. However, as someone who has studies serious Ritual Magic, i can tell you that any occultist will say that you have to put some of your own self into any spell to make it work. the more of your own essence you put into anything , the more power it has got.

My own lasagna is a killer, and you can't get it in the shops.
the secret of making it can be got on LJ , however * evol grin*

Cooking can be so much fun and it tastes so much better when it's all fresh and...real.
Damned right. And so is real home made chocklit...
This is the big question we maut all face in life. is it better to have cheap, second rate and off the shelf products, or to put in the efort to aquire the very best? I take option B, and support your freedom of choice should you decide to do likewise. :)
my problem right now is that i dont have an oven...I love to bake stuff and I make the best brwonies in the world but I can't do it here!
ohh, we could all share our secret cooking...secrets *lol*

yeah, I think that's so cool about the buddhist tea ceremony. it takes forever to make it and they never drink more than a cup, because it's not about getting fluid into your body but spiritually taking something of your own spirit into your body. same with cleaning. they concentrate on every single movement.
that#s probably why I enjoy drawing so much. i have to concentrate on every little line, and that way I put so much of myself into the drawing!
my problem right now is that i dont have an oven
How sad. I shall adress this issue in my next post to this community.
I have aquired a scanner, and am able to upload images onto Lj via a pic hosting account. I would really love to see some of your drawings, even if we never get round to sharing some Brownies in London...
oh, I can scan some of my stuff :) sure
I'll do that!
:) that's right...I should get a cholocale-cooking-book!
I congratulate you on making a wise and life affirming choice.
Remeber, chocolate is not fattening - it's the sugar, milk and other crap that they cut it with that piles on the calories! take responsibility for your own supplies of happiness and contentment and make your own!
yeah, and it's pretty easy to make,too, now that i think of it. :) I really am going to make some chocolate, yay :D